Friday, October 28, 2016

Comeback Kid

The Band Perry, an awesome band, recently released a song called, "Comeback Kid". To me, it's talking about being bullied and torn down but fighting and believing in yourself so that you get stronger and win the battle. I don't know the story behind this song, though I plan to look it up and I recommend you do as well. For me, it hits deeper than just a bully on a playground, or at work. Bullies don't have to be people, did you know that?

But no, I'm not leaving, even though I'm bleeding
Even though this nightmare makes me wish I was dreaming
Even though I hate it, I'm gonna take it
Until I win

I was lucky, I guess...I was never bullied in school. I was stuck in the middle; not popular but not hated either. My bully showed up after I had my daughter. No, it wasn't her ha.ha. It was the Post Partum Depression.  If you've never encountered this; be it personally or having stood by someone as they dealt with it...count your blessings. I wouldn't wish PPD on my worst enemy.

Don't know why bad things happened, but they did
I don't think I deserve the hurt I get, but I'm made for it
It's not the end, no, it's not the end
I'm a comeback kid
Down for a minute; I'll get up again
Looks like I'm breaking, but it's just a bend; it's not over yet
Cause in the end
 I'm a comeback kid

Everyone around you suffers when you are dealing with this bully. A force that tries to cripple every dream you ever had before you had kids. It destroys families because, let's face it; it's not easy to be around someone whose dealing with this. Many people find help through therapy, drugs, and an abundance of understanding friends and family. Therapy didn't work for me....I was told I didn't have PPD...I was just "overwhelmed"...and I was "borderline". Drugs aren't my cup of tea, I believe they numb the issue and not actually fix it. As for understanding people, I can count on half of my hand the people who have stood by my side through this over the last 6 years. The worst is over, but I still have days where I feel like I'm not good enough, that my kids would do better with a woman whose built to be a good mom, that my husband would fair better with a wife that didn't have days where she wanted to dig a hole and live there forever. PPD is dark, lonely at times, and scary.

  I'm gonna finish what I started now
           You interrupted me with all your doubts
           How dare you forget where I started out

To the people who are still here, thank you does not begin to describe the love I have for each and every one of you. Thank you for standing by me, even during the times I didn't want to even be with myself. Thank you for not giving up, and trusting that the person I was meant to be was there, fighting hard to erase the dark cloud that attempted to permanently take over my life. 
To bands like The Band Perry, thank you for writing, singing, playing and believing in music such as this song. It's because of people like you, that those like me have hope that brighter days will follow. Thank you for reminding me that I am indeed: A Comeback Kid! <3

photo courtesy of  the image section of yahoo :)